The things we fear the most may be the things that help heal us the most

I’ve known Bettina Ossana and her wonderful family since I was a child. I grew up with her son and her daughter was my age and we went to prom together. She watched me grow from a scared child to an ever grateful father and a husband. I was never proud of my past and so I stayed away as an adult hoping to not cause any more hurt to her and her family. I remember when I had no home to go to I stayed with her son at his place.  I respected the fact they never made me feel judged for the mislead lifestyle I was involved with. As years past I watched my good friends turn into distant memories of a past I was trying to escape. One day my friend called me to inform me of my other friends passing. My heart broke for their family and it encouraged me to get in touch to see how I could help, if at all. 

I watched these folks go through the hardest experience of their life and from a distance all I felt was, helpless.

I was super anxious about showing my face again. My mind raced with fears of if they would they be angry? Have they forgiven me for all the wrong I had brought around?Would I be a burden of a blessing? It took every ounce of my being to show up and accept any and every possible outcome. I could be rejected or accepted. But the closer I got all I saw was smiles and hugs? This was not expected. The more I showed up the more I noticed this contagious behavior of love and acceptance taking place. We shared our new found beliefs of health, love and letting go and immediately recognized that we now were on the same path. We had both lost so much in the last 12 years and from my recent fathers passing it struck me that these people had come back into my life for some reason. I wish I could summarize my experience but I feel it would cheapen the connection. The only way to define it is this: You know how when a storm comes? You run, hide and cover up. When it passes you peak out the window, crack the door and walk out slowly. When all that has scared us and hurt us has past, all that's left is cleaned new ground. For me It leaves me with a calming sense of center. It opens my eyes to how this hurt inside can be healed and though a long road, now I have the strength and foresight to take that first step. 

Tina has a profound connection with horses. She has used her love, passion and ability to communicate properly, to help autistic children. Her warm vibration lifts those who can’t lift themselves and if you saw her on the street you would never guess the immense struggle she and her family have had to endure. She shared “When man is frightened of something greater then him, he breaks that person, place or thing down to be able to hold rein over it. This is not the way things should be.” She informed me “Paul, horses are not to be feared. They can teach us to love that of which we don’t understand. They can help heal us physically and emotionally.”  I walked away with a new understanding of horses and of my long time friends path she has now embarked on. Tina’s husband Jeff turned to his art. I will video some of his art and write more about his journey. They are creations of true passion and pure intention. He told me “Paul, every night I have to give up the keys to God. I have detached from all the hurt and attachment to objects of this earth. And though I will enjoy every moment on earth, I have to remind myself I am merely passing through this life and I belong with God, my brother, my father and my son.”

What do we do when life challenges our will, our desires and our intentions? These two completely let go and turned to what they love the most. They follow their heart now and nothing but. I was nervous to “Show Up” but when I walked away I walked away with an elated self of being a clearer understanding of my new found path. They have given me the greatest gift and that is the permission to let go as well. 

“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.”

―Ann Landers

HELPING THE YOUTH OF MY NATIVE DECENT

    I spent the last two nights with an Indigenous education program. Something happened that made me stop and take a deep breath.

As I was about to tune my guitar with an app on my phone, I dropped my phone on the soft sand, and it broke, I thought "How strange it would break like that...?" As I performed my stories of struggle and change my capo snapped in half....I thought "Huh, I've never once had that happen in all the years of playing..." When I left the gathering the second night I noticed someone ran into my car and left, I thought "S**t, what's going on here?" I couldn't tune my guitar or play my songs in the keys I had felt were most comfortable and now I have to pay for someone else's mistake... 

As a performer I have learned to disconnect from discomfort and be present in the moment, so that's what I did. As I performed in front of these children my songs of my journey, the wind blew my hair in my face, my voice was dry and cracking and out of breath from nerves, I had to decide on what my purpose was for that moment. I remember speaking of courage, I asked if they knew what the definition was? I regained focus on the fact that the reason I'm here today and not strung out on drugs, in jail or dead like many of my people, is because of the ones that came to me when I was broken and helped lift me up( Johnny Bear Contreras ). Now it's my turn. I promised to give back from all of which I had taken, to return the favor and so that's what I'm doing here. It's not about me and my things, it's about teaching these kids to care for this earth and for each other. #ItsAboutUs

"My heart is a flower. That blooms every hour. I believe in the power...of love." -Amos Lee

Love = Love

What is life without love? Bob Marley said it best “The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the one worth suffering for.”

Alex & Sierra are two young extremely talented kids who are the same age, who are madly in love, who perform as an amazing duo and who just won the 3rd and final X Factor USA! They are on top of the world in every way. I love their music so much because it takes me back to when I first met my awesome wife Lacey Boyer Cannon. I fell madly in love with her as soon as I heard her telling a co-worker about her wild dream she had of doughnuts. I knew I had every odd against me but it didn't stop me from vigorously pursuing the most lovely human I have ever met. Hard work shouldn't discourage you from what gives your heart life, so until this day I do everything in my power to keep that fire stoked.

Love is bigger then just you and I. It's almost as if there's a magical connection between all human beings. When one person opens their heart then it inspires another to do the same and then another. I love that I am a part of this recycled energy belief system and here is a perfect example of how it works: A group of us that love each other, had so much love inside that we had to write a love song. We found other people we loved and we showed them the love song. These people loved the love song so much that they decided to recycle this love. Now there's a love triangle through a love connection that has also been opened up to all the people they love...

You can pre-order A&S's debut album "It's about Us" on iTunes, which has our love song (It's About Us) on it. Much, Much Love.‪#‎AllWeNeedIsLove ‪#‎MyTribe

Learn The World's Rules So You Can Break Them Acordingly

Well... the suns hot, the water is warm, the surf is good, kids are home from school, BBQ's are fired up, good people and long days
at the beach... aside from Christmas, this is the most wonderful time of year!
We thought we would give you an update on whats new in the PCB camp.

First of all thank you to everyone that has donated to the "My Tribe" campaign!! Unfortunately we didn't reach our goal but that's not going to stop us from putting out another single, art, merchandise at shows, etc. until we whittle away at the full length album that will hopefully follow shortly after. The people that expressed their support mean more to me then anything on this Earth. Your actions are seen as a complete heart acting in love. You gave a part of your life to support a part of mine and if you know me and where I come from, this is a tremendous respect and I hold the greatest gratitude towards you. Please bare with us for the next few months as we build resources for the next album :)

We are pursuing new avenues of expression.....

I have felt this strong vibration in my personal life that has opened up a new part of my soul. As a people we are being held down by powers greater then us and it's only ourselves we can blame. Whether it's a job we feel we can't leave, an old/new relationship that brings us down, the fear that we are not strong enough to succeed or the fear of change. We hold ourselves back from the things we want and need and we don't even realize it. We will gladly blame society, the President, our boss but we never stop to think maybe it is us who needs to make the change. So that's what I'm doing now.
   For me it's the music business. Even though I have succeeded in the music business thus far and still participate, I'm convinced I can form a new method that is more rewarding for me and "My Tribe". When a young artist signs with a major label they now have to sign a 360 deal which means they advance you say 20k for living expenses and then you owe them that 20k plus all recording, touring, merchandising expenses that could add up to millions. This leaves the artists in debt and under the gun with having to conform to any request of that label.

I recently had a song placed on a popular main stream album that will be a great success for me and my brand. This is amazing! Although I am super grateful for this huge success, I don't want to loose sight of what's important to me as an artist...which is keeping things authentic and appealing to my "Homegrown" family. The way I can stay connected to my Homegrown roots is by cutting out the middle man and embarking on an adventure of bringing my music (for free) to fans in their back yard. So far 90% of our work has been under the radar and strictly word of mouth. The amazing people I work with and myself have been invited into; peoples houses, work spaces, farms, schools, charity fundraisers and hospitals to perform...these are the most rewarding for us. If you would like to be apart of this movement then please write us at info@paulcannonband.com for more info.

Our goal is to bring this music straight to the people who want it, no middle man, no fussing with the music promoters, radio, TV, music venues etc.
We know this will be a fun backyard adventure where community will come together to experience evenings of great music, friendship and fun!  

We do however respect the companies, radio stations, artists, producers, music venues and other affiliates we work with and we greatly honor our established relations even in this new adventure :)

For our greatest supporter KPRi we will be performing at this years Green Flash Concert Series on Sept. 17th w/ Augutana!!!
Show Info Here

You are more then what they tell you, you have a beautiful soul and the ability to do whatever your heart desires. As soon as we all realize this then we will be stronger then those that have held us down.

PCB loves you.

Free Tickets & First Listen to Our New Single!!

        In the music industry in order to book a show, get a manger or get signed to a label you must have a healthy social media presence. Artists are defined by their social media presence and by how many people come out to shows and support. When labels, managers, music venues, promoters  and other potential business partners want to get a rough Idea of how well an artist is doing they look at their Facebook likes and YouTube views. We try not to involve our fans aka "My Tribe" with all the in and outs of the business but I think it's important that you know some of the ways you can show support. If you believe in what we believe in what we do then we would ask you to click on the photo below (with the Friar on it) which will direct you to our personal "Band Page" where you can press the like button.  This will help us greatly and In return for going out of your way to do this for us we will enter you in a contest to win a pair of tickets to our next KPRi Presents show at the Belly Up tavern on March 12th!!

  Now if you get a friend or friends to like us too (and message us through our FaceBook Band Page letting us know) then we will send you our new single!!!!This new song we have been working on has really opened up a new path for me and I feel like I'm using a new part of my heart and soul if that makes sense?This new song is about how I've spent my whole life fighting and running from a past/ a people that was trying to keep me down. When I look back now those things that use to bring fear are nowhere to be found. I realized that I spent most of my life running away that I din't ever stop to enjoy what I had including the people around me. This song is about just that it's me saying I'm done with thinking about me from now on I'm ...Thinking Bout You.

 

Behind the Writing 3 - We Can Change

I don't have much figured out but one thing I do have figure out  is that it starts in your mind and it ends in your action. My dad once told me "son, people will talk for days but unless they actually do it then whats the point? you'll know people by there actions."  I love believing in greater things it makes me feel alive!!! I love finding people with the same belief system a people of hope, love and prosperity!!..... but  thoughts only get me so far.




If we can find a spark of hope to better  ourselves and those around us  then think we have a chance become a brighter people. I love believing that my people have expanded from my tribe here on the San Pasqual Reservation out to the whole country. The more I travel and meet people the more I see we are all connected in so many ways, so rad. As I was laying in bed last night my wife brought up an interesting point. "I think this is a time of change with our generation, I think people are ready for it." I think she is right, I think we can change the world.

#Confession Friday

#ConfessionFriday  

 I remember when my friend use to speak with me  about organic food, gluten allergies and holistic living. I was intrigued  but never payed too much attention.  I was convinced It was all hype and I thought I was pretty healthy considering I didn't eat junk food and I loved veggies. I started watching documentaries, reading more on the subjects and conducting my own  physical experiments to see if there was any connection with these holistic philosophies. I didn't want to be wrapped up in others beliefs but I also didn't want to deny my self the knowledge if it could benefit me.  I started challenging my own logic that same logic we all use the logic  passed down to us by our friends, family and TV commercials. I use to believe that if I had a salad at Chili's I was doing better then others. I know now that a salad from Chili's has anywhere from 800-1,500 calories in it and it's full of dead food. I learned iceburg lettuce has no real nutrients. I saw that milk and other dairy products made me itch, gain weight and feel shitty so I stopped using them... Except stinky cheese I'm still working on that one!  I was taught that the food business is just that it's a business and most every product on the shelf at Von's, Ralph's and Albertsons has been modified for a longer shelf life. The chemicals and process they use  to extend these products shelf life cause cancer, digestive, neurological and physical damage and disease that will eventually cripple, hinder or kill you.   There was one doctor that said something that changed my life "If you eat dead food how do you expect to feel alive?" ...Shit. "When you eat something that has no nutrients in it you use the enzymes and nutrients from your body to break it down. Therefore taking away the good that's in your body instead of replenishing it."  That's why your tired after you eat a burrito, white bread, chips or soda.  

I'm sorry if this comes across as braggy or preachy  that is not my intention. I am guilty of falling victim to cravings and addictions. All I''m saying is give it a chance if you haven't already.   Open up to the possibility that we can fix common aliments by changing our diet changing the way we view each other and view the world. Consider that we can change our lives from changing our thought process. Don't become an extremist though and be better then everyone else just listen to your body. By taking care of yourself and those around you.... you become that change you wish to see in the world.  I have been in denial about gluten for....3 years and I finally have come to a cross roads where I am having serious issues due to a little bread here and there. I absolutely hate giving up things I love or old habits that make me feel comforted but what's my other option. I didn't know my grandparents and quite a few family members because they all died from cancer or some other self inflicted disease they could have avoided through healthier thinking and behavior. 

I am on a life long journey of enlightenment but it doesn't mean I don't back slide and give in here and there it means I don't ever stop trying to improve. I love the people in my life that inspire me to think healthier wether they realize it or not.  Many Blessings!

PROJECT HOMEGROWN - How Paul Cannon is Using Music to Make a Difference

I have always been deeply connected to music and I think it's because I recognize that it's more then just notes that  I'm hearing. When I listen to music I  hear peoples struggle, life experiences, hopes, dreams and drive to create. Music helps me navigate through this sometimes jungle of an existence and reassures me that I am connected to others. The most fascinating stories are those of artists that have persevered through their struggle and what became of it. In return this is my goal to be an inspiration in my craft and nurture that craft the best I can. Did you know Madonna quit attending her Ivy league Collage to move to New York to work at a doughnut shop? She was determined to become a dancer/ singer but after a week of being in N.Y. a man came down her fire escape and raped her. This would have been enough for anyone to re-think their current life direction but as we all know she has gone on to make monumental moves in the music business and in supporting and starting hundreds of charities.

So what is my story going to look like? Will I have a grand story to tell VH1? Will VH1 still exist? I feel I have survived a great deal in my life but now I must survive my life in the music business. I know one thing and that's what my professor told me when I was in school "The opposite of success isn't failure, the opposite of success is when you quit". 

Well I don't know what my story will be in the future but I know what I'm trying to do now. Through all my past experiences I have come to realize that I'm here for a reason and the only way for me to feel ok about my life is by giving back. That's why I set out to make music for those that don't have hope, that need peace or just need some good vibes. I not only believe I  can make an impact on my people  but I have developed relations with others that believe the same...and together we have seen this come to life. I have a heart for healing and helping those that can't help themselves. I do what I can when I can and even by just doing a little it adds up in the long run. Let me let you in on the ways I and my brand give back...

I donate my time to good causes whether its the big names like Susan G Komen or the little guys like Students Heal. I'll help you mow your lawn if that's where you really need help. Something I try to do on a daily basis is support the little guy and that's usually the local guy!!  I use local recording studios, I rock a Taylor Guitar (which is a local eco-responsible company), we hire/ support local musicians, we use organic cotton T's from a local distributor, we make our own merchandise or contract out local artists for merch, we eat local and organic (wether in a restaurant or farmers market), we support our local Surfrider Foundation Chapter by donating time, services or money, I ONLY rock gear from Hippy Tree Organic Clothing which is a sustainable clothing line. But the main way I
give back is by "keeping my side of the street clean" in other words  we encourage positive attitudes and good vibes which we believe is the starting point to any positive growth in us as a people.

Currently we are at the infant stages of launching a national campaign that will directly benefit The Cultivate Foundation and Farm Aid. Our intention is to bring awareness to the benefit of supporting your local farming community and how this practice will not only nourish your body and stimulate your local economy but re-connect people to their land in their hometowns. We are working with awesome companies and organizations like: Farm Aid, Chipotle, GoPro, Hippy Tree Organic Clothing, Taylor Guitars and Amy's Organic Kitchen...who also carry this vision. Stay tuned as more details unfold and on how you and your community can get involved with this exciting project!!! So exciting.

Paul Cannon Band is going to keep doing everything we can to become a positive force in our community and we would like you to join us. When you support us in any way you too become a part of our "people". Love & Respect!

-Paul

How Becoming a Father Changed My Life

When I first found out I was going to be a father I was pretty nervous and stoked. I ran around Santa Cruz  yelling “I'm going to be a father!!!!”.  I was living in Santa Cruz, Ca., I was in a surf rock band (Don’t Bother to Knock) and didn’t have a care in the world ;)

Having a child brings up your greatest fears. When my wife was pregnant I was worried if he would come out “normal”, when he was born I was worried about accidentally hurting him. When we drove from the hospital we drove 3mph all the way home….and we were terrified! I was worried if he would grow up like I did? Would he have the same troubles as me? Would he be subject to the cancer that runs through my blood line? Would he be prone to the addictions that have plagued my people?

For the first 3 months I don’t think I slept and for the last 5 years I have jumped out of bed every day at 6am consistently….why? It first started because we would check the crib every 20mins to make sure he was alive. Then once he was a little older he would get up so early that the latest I could sleep in was 5-6am. When my son was 3 months old one of our greatest fears came true. He was diagnosed with craniosynostosis which if left untreated would cause brain damage and eventually death. So at three months old he went in to have a 6 inch section cut out of his skull. So we did what we do best, we kept peace and stayed positive. He had to wear a customized helmet for months after. We would do custom ghost flames and other rad themes on them. Instead of people feeling bad for him they would stop us to ask us where we got the little skater helmet!!

Being a father is a trip. It brings out your greatest fears but it also created a sense of purpose, ability, stability, structure, hope, peace and strength all the things a wild animal  needs in his life. Fear will either beat you down or lift you up and for me it brought out the best. Yesterday my son almost stood up on a surfboard! He just learned how to push with one foot on a skateboard. He finally is singing with me. He swims like a fish. He’s super clever and is all around a huge blessing in my life. When I took him on tour I remember I just got off stage in SF and we sat to watch TP and when I looked down he crashed out on the floor. It was probably the coolest feeling the feeling that he was with me on this journey of  positive change and that this would stay in his memory bank forever. Yesterday he was listening to an ipod and he said “listen dad I like this song.” I said “that’s Tristan” he said “No it’s that girl we went on tour with?”I replied “Yes, that’s Tristan…”  

So my point to this blog is…I was super nervous and now I’m super stoked!! Being a father has brought out the best because I was afraid of the worst. And it has also allowed forgiveness, peace and balance in my life. Thanks Ashland Irie Cannon for being my little bro!!

West Coast Tour w/ Tristan Prettyman :)

  When TP first asked me to go on the road with her I lost my s*** with excitement!!!!  Not only am I a huge fan of hers but I was going to be playing  all my favorite cities up and down the west coast in support!! (Santa Barbara, Santa Cruz, Portland, Seattle, San Francisco, Los Angeles and back home for a double date at the Belly Up Tavern)  This was my first tour  and yes TP took my tour virginity but she was gentle ;)  You always remember your first and while on the trip I found an analogy of what it felt like.  

         

Great American Music Hall-San Francisco

   I was driving (Lacey was) from Santa Barbara to Santa Cruz and we drove right through a rainbow!  I remember Lacey saying "I've never seen the end of rainbow before?.." and I thought "neither have I?!!"  It got me thinking of what it would feel like being in the middle of a rainbow, have you ever been  super close to a rainbow? It seems that, like most things we want in life, the closer you get the further they appear or they might vanishe all together. At first when you see a rainbow in front of you, you think about what it would be like to find the end. Will it vanish? Will there be gold? Where does the leprechaun come into play? This time it was happening for real and I was at a loss for words. When your in the middle of a rainbow you think "Wow, is this really happening it feels so surreal!" Your captivated by the thought of it all happening while feeling pressure to soak up as much of the color as possible. Not only are you distracted by all thats going on but time seems to be going even faster. If you look around the image is a bit blurred, your senses are heightened but you still recognize this is happening and then all the sudden......it's over. You pass through and then almost immediately you start looking back. The image is once again strong and reassuring of the fact that this just happened. This was the best experience of my life. I got to see TP kill it night after night, I got to see wonderful friends, fans and family in the most awesome'est cities on the west coast and all with my wife and son.                 

 Tristan is the kindest most balanced and full of life person I have met. Not only did she allow my wife and son to come along but she embraced me as an artist and brought so much light to my path.  It was a memory for the books. Thanks for being you, Love & Respect :)

Click here for a video from tour!!

I would like to acknowledge that we had tremendous support from local companies like; Perfect Foods Bars & Jlab Audio. and from our incredibly awesome fans, you know who you are ;)  Thanks everyone....Much Love!!!

Behind the Writing - 2 PCB + Bushwalla = Homegrown

I had originally wrote a song titled Homegrown that payed tribute to my hometown, knowing the commercial appeal would be limited.  When I approached the group on what the title of our album would be they said "Homegrown" and the reason we decided on that name is because it represents everything we are about right now as a group. We grow tomatoes and all types of greens at our studio, the vibe we put out is raw and "organic," our PCB "Tree-shirts" that we sell at our shows are 100% organic and everything we do, we do from the heart and we try to not add too much hype or fillers.
 Let me clear up what organic means to us:  

or·gan·ic

  (awr-gan-ik) adjective
Pertaining to the shapes or forms in a work of art that are of irregular contour and seem to resemble or suggest forms found in nature.

So when it came to recording our first full length album, we stripped down to the basics; good tone, good vibes and good people in the musical sessions. We then had to find the right environment, the right  equipment and right person to control the situation... so "naturally" we turned to our good friend Billy Galewood aka Bushwalla .  It was literally the night before that I approached the group and said "we should record a full length" they asked "when were you thinking...in a month or two?"  I replied "tomorrow!!" They hesitated at first but being the super trusting group of friends that they are they said "...sure lets do it!!" I called Billy and boom, he opened his studio doors and helped produce/engineer an album that would express that raw, organic vibe we needed. 

When we first talked of recording Homegrown, two questions popped up; what if this gets picked up outside of San Diego and would we have to edit the city for every city we play in? These were great questions and I had no answers. I turned to my home skillet Billy-Bush and he interjected "Paul I have been all around the world and one thing I have seen is that people love SD. Being from SD is something to be proud of, so show your love and do your thing." So I just left it at that and let the universe find a path for it... 

Turns out A few months later we were invited to play a show with the Wallflowers, Tristan Prettyman and Walk the Moon for the KPRI & Anthology's Street Beat Concert. I was doing a live radio interview with the owner of KPRI about the song and he expressed great interest in the song. We played our set and after he came up and said "What a great song Paul, how would you feel if we based a TV commercial around it?" I answered "sounds like a deal." They were starting a local campaign where they would design a TV commercial that would have local San Diegans singing along to our song. So they did and  I was super flattered to have my home town showing so much love and so...here it is.
                                 
Whether it's standing in La Jolla Cove starring at Dr. Seuss's house, praying in a sweat lodge on my reservation, skating through the Gas lamp District at night or dropping in on a perfect wave on a perfect day to see three spotted dolphins right underneath me, I always stop to thank God for a land that my people have called home for thousands of years. We have so many blessings in our lives but in this song I picked just one "San Dieeeeego!"  

Thank you for all the love and support!

Behind the Writing 1

  In this series of blogs I will talk about; what inspired the music, how the music is written, challenges we face as artists, how we recorded the music and all the fun we had along the way :)
   
   As an artist It's so easy to get lost in this over saturated "pop-fest" it's easy to compare and to be compared to the likes of others and feel that's all you are. Don't get me wrong I understand the business side of things and I understand it enough to know that I should not be defined by the strides of others. This is a beautiful world where we have the luxury to define our own path and even though our own path may take longer then the pre-beaten one it is more fulfilling in the long run. These songs on the new album are an expression of that thought pattern, they are an expression of staying true to my own path with respecting but excepting minimal input from the music industry. I have learned to  accept a certain level of criticism from fans, artists, teachers, producers and even my own people. The hardest part is finding the dividing line between others advice and what you believe to be true.  I  have to balance out what other peoples  understandings of my path are  and of what my own understandings of my path are. It seems effortless to get trapped in the "statistics" of others but like Jay-Z says "People will tell you how to do it even though they have never done it."

   This is how I view life: It's like being caught in a rip current and your paddling your ass off for no reason but if you slow down, do steady strokes and strategize your exit you'll eventually get to where you need to be!   So here's to breathing and believing we are right where we need to be! Here's to all the support from those that believe in this whisper of a dream. Thank you and please keep checking back for more stories on behind the writing of our full length album - Homegrown.

Much Love!
Paul

I fell In love with a girl named Lacey :)

I was like most 20 yr. olds, immature. I had no money, no car, no goals but was good at partying. I Had just moved down to the Gas lamp district to take over an apartment my brother had been living in. I was working at Hooters, as a cook, and at T.G.I.Fridays as a busser. I remember it like yesterday me and my main man William Smith were sitting in the restaurant filling out an application. I looked up for a minute to see this very attractive bleached blonde girl walk past. She had extremely large and sexy ...... glasses, a light linen toned Roxy purse that said "I Love Boys" and tight black spandex pants ;) I was intrigued.

I continued spending most of my days skating through down town, burning my fingers on buffalo wing grease and playing the corners for pocket change. The first day at TGIF sucked, I had coleslaw and dishwasher duty. I spent the first week dreading my job hoping for some abrupt change of pace to override these feelings of mediocrity. Then she walked in. That one girl I saw a few weeks ago was leaning over the cooks counter to place an order. She cracked a joke, smiled and made eye contact. I must admit I felt that she was way out of my league. She had every guy in that place wrapped around her finger. Then here I am... the only thing I owned was a skateboard I stole from my freind. I had a shaved head, plugs, I was timid and was way to easy to pass by. Later down the road my wife would say she wasn't even that attracted to me at first. I wasnt her type...hmmm ok, lol. She had it all man, she was gorgeous, funny, she had tattoos!!, big boobs, nice butt and she was so approachable. Everything that matters to a man. By walking over and saying "hey" she made every part of my body tingle, it was like a fire started in my bones and my heart trying to put it out by beating faster. It was hard to be confident wearing those cattle poop scooping gloves and being elbow deep in coleslaw but I managed to make basic conversation. We chatted a bit, she asked "where ya from" and I responded "from an indian reservation up north, u?" "I'm from washington state but I was living in orange county. I just moved down here because of the MTV show Real World San Diego!" I then answered "awesome...".

This was going to be a hard catch for me, she had her pick of any guy in there and I didn't have much to offer. So I started to strategize first i have to get to know her. I started hanging out with the guys she was friends with. She was a waitress and I was a busser so I figured that I could start to bus only her tables to make small talk....brand recognition. Some call this stalking but I call it persistence. Once we got to a comfortable acquaintance level. I made my move. I approached her " Hey Lacey can I ask a favor, do you have a minute?" " not right now I am taking a phone order, give me one sec..." She said " no stress" I replied. The thing was I didn't have a good question to ask, so if she gave me her undivided attention I would have to make it good. So I panicked and went with plan b... I wrote my number on a piece of paper and with one hand I held it up to her. I made eye contact and a mouthed the words "call me". She could have just ignored that paper but I was hoping I had charmed her enough to get her curiosity sparked. After all I had spent that whole day dropping bits of info about me like how I was awesome, I knew stuff and I had cool friends. There is a total art to selling yourself and I nailed it!

And wouldn't you know she called that night. I still remember the voicemail "Hey Paul this is Lacey from work, sorry I couldn't talk earlier. I tried finding you but you took off. You said you had a favor to ask so I figured it had to be about sex, drugs or rock and roll...just kidding!! give me a call back" When I called back I came clean and said it was my brilliant attempt to hang out with her. She said she was at her aunt's with her cat and she had to stay in that night. I said "if it makes it easier just bring your cat with you and she can stay in my place?" From that night we never left each others side. She moved in shortly after, I quit Hooters and A few months later we tattooed each others names on our ring fingers. We have been together for 8 yrs and will be married for 7 in March. We have a 4 yr old child and I am so glad she decided to see the potential in me. Stay tuned for her version of the story!! lol.

HOW ART HEALS

I remember my first encounter with art, It was 1989 and I was in Kindergarten. My mom had set me up with construction paper, macaroni, acorns and glue. I was stoked!! My second significant encounter was years later. I actually got stoked on art based off of my oldest brother Mel. I watched as he drew cartoon ants with helmets on their heads..."Army Ants" which also plagued our property. From this point I was obsessed with drawling skulls and boobies (.)(.)

There were never any musical instruments in my house growing up or any other type of artistic options for that matter. When I started painting ostrich eggs with native American themes my mom was like " Oh...thats nice" and when I started making rough recordings my mom said "Oh...thats nice" Even as an adult when I'm like "I got on American Idol!!!" she says" Oh...thats nice" or "I got the call back from a Bravo reality show and I'm top 3 songwriters and they are going to start filming me in Holly Wood!!!" she says " cool..." I have accepted peoples response to my lifestyle choices and I guess you can't expect people to have the same vision as you. Like how people respond when my wife tells them "my husbands a musician" :/ Oh well! :) Speaking of lifestyle choices...The other night my father asked me if I was happy to get my Tattoos at such a young age (I was fifteen when I got my last name tatted across my back) I said "I knew there was only one path for me and I accepted that at a young age." Also getting tattoos back then on your wrists was social and career suicide.

In elementary school I was always that cool kid that wore cartoon graphics on my t-shirts and (I mean the ones that take up the whole shirt) "hand me down" men's XL fluorescent green parachute pants.

Like most of us I felt out of place, insecure and timid as a teenager. I was always fighting with my parents/ kids at school. I was always in trouble: getting kicked out of school and in 'n' out of court. I was trying to be cool any way I could and that meant doing whatever it took to prove myself. See the problem was I wanted to be cool so bad. Once I realized that certain people weren't worth impressing then I changed route. I used art to make my own path, I started using art to vent, to express my abstract thoughts and to attract a different breed of friends.

In middle school I was well know for my sketches ... this lasted all the

way to high school. I even used my sketches for trade!! drugs, school supplies, favors and even kisses and hugs from the popular girls ;) I was a typical boy. At one point a girl that I was in love with told her dad of my art and he asked me to illustrate a book for him which was published and can still be purchased in Barnes and Nobel

http://www.quickchills.com/bh_bt_ai.htm.

Art was my voice... it has opened so many doors in my life now that I couldn't have even imagined.

To me everything has the ability to be art. Anything can be taken from its original state to be made to sooth your soul and those souls around you. I would be lost without the impressions from people that gave their time and vision without any strings attached. In return, for all that have had an influence in young peoples lives, I have dedicated my journey to giving in that same light. It's like building a fire on the coast so others can stay warm and see through the darkness. This isn't about radio play or unit sales this is about opening a young persons mind to a world of hope and possibilities.

I went from taking risks as a youth, to impress friends, to taking financial and business risks to make my own

path. You could ask me to " jump off this,

make this or paddle out into that!" and I would say "Sure!" Now the tone of questions have changed but the vibe remains. You can ask me "help with this, volunteer for that, make this happen." and I would say " Sure!" Getting older allows me to reflect and appreciate having "balls" as a child. Now when they say " you'll never make it...the odds are slim" I say " I'm not afraid of failing, I know my limits but I'm also not afraid of working hard to get what I want. Most importantly I believe in my dreams"

-Paul

"If you asked people what they want, they would of said faster horses." - Henry Ford